hello all

how is my fellow blogger friends and family i want to talk about gods love and my daughter tonight............ we will start at the begining my daugher hannah who is now 2 was born febuary 27 2004 she was a pure joy hardly ever cried............... anyway... hannah got sick around october of 2004 she was having trouble breathing they gave her a nebulizer and sent her home she stayed sick for a little while and a couple weeks later we took her back to the emergancy room..... they didnt do anything said she would be ok just to keep giving her her breathing treatment every couple of hours........... i did that and it got worse so i had to drive 45 minutes to the childrens hospital i was sooo scared because before i took her to the hospital she was starting to grunt i just knew she wasnt gonna make it i kept praying that god would help me get to the hospital in time........... well i got to the hospital and got her out of the car and she was turning blue and was lifeless....... i was sooooo scared my son dj was with me he was scared to he stayed with me the whole time........ i was alone except for my kids i was almost panicking............. i was definately crying........ any way they immediately took her to the back to the doctor her oxygen level was deahtly low i dont think it was even 30 her lips were blue the doctors immediately started working on her she didnt move at all no struggle in her what so ever................. the doctors were asking me all kind of questions that i couldnt even think of the answers i felt like a horrible mother but i was just worried about my baby that was all i could think of they put in a breathing tube down her throat that was horrible they put in a iv and sent her to the pediatric intensive care unit.......... i then watched them do a spinal tap on my 8 month old she still didnt move i knew i had just waited to long to bring her to the hospital........... they then began to run test take blood poke and jab it seemed like nothing came back the next few hours the doctor came in and told my husband and i {he came to the hospital when they were bring hannah up to the picu} he told us hannah had pnumonia in both her lung and there was a lot of it........... then they told us she had rsv a lung infection that premature and low birth weight babies get hannah was neither..... well then they told us she had whooping cough a very deadly sickness......... well she ended up not having the whooping cough thank god............ but they tried to keep her sedated..... and she would wake up a little and u could just look at her and see the tears come down her cheeks.........i wanted to be in her place i prayed that god would let her be ok and take me instead i didnt want her to suffer this please god give it to me i would say as i sat there and watched her cry........... she would wake up and cough and try to pull the tube out of her mouth it was horrible......... i still have a hard time talking about it.......... they ended up having to strap her hands down so she wouldnt pull the tubes down they loaded her little body down with iv fluids because she was severely dehydrated from the heavy breathing............. it seemed like she would never be able to wake up......... her little body was swollen her eyes were swollen that was awful........ god touch her please place angels all around her i would say............... one morning when we woke up her oxygen level was way up to like 80 percent thank you god for touching my angel i said they let her wake up slowly....... and they took the tube out of her and finally woke her completley up i was soo happy my hubby and i both just cried god had brought my baby through this praise his holy name.............. we werent at the hospital very long after that she just made a miraculas recovery it was almost instant she has since then been diagnosed with asthma we already knew she had it duh........ i am not even a doctor........... she has been in the hospital 6 more time none as bad as that ......... it is hard to write about it even now i dont know how i made it through yes i do i do god brought all of us through when i brought her to the er on that dreadful afternoon dj was a rock he told me mommy it will be ok he went to her even while she lay there motionless and he told her hannah it is going to be ok i love you baby girl that is her nickname......... he was scared but he was strong for me and hannah thank you god for my little rock thank u for dj................. i am sitting here remembering this and crying with joy god pulled us all through this he showed me his love that night and many other time he shows me his love everyday of my life......... wow it is amazing how i could sin so much and him still love me it is that was with my kids i can yell at them a thousand times a day but they will come up to me and tell me they love me and give me hugs and kisses.................... i have made a decision tonight i am gonna walk beside god not behind him i am gonna hold his hands on those bumpy roads that i cant walk alone and if i get a little ahead of my self and stumble to the ground i am gonna reach for his hand that is always waithing to pull me up and wipe away my tears and continue with my lifes journey............. thank you god for loving me i love you toooooo

today

TODAY WAS A GREAT DAY THE KIDS WERE PRETTY GOOD EXCEPT WHEN DJ TRIED TO PULL THE PUPPIES EAR OFF I ASKED HIM WHAT HE WOULD DO IF THE PUPPY DECIDED TO PULL HIS EAR OFF HE SAID HE WOULD CRY......... DUH ........ AND I HAD TO PUT HANNAH IN TIME OUT FOR NOT LISTENING ONE TIME TODAY BUT OTHER THAN THAT THEY HAVE BEEN GREAT KIDS HANNAH IS ASLEEP SHE FELL ASLEEP IN THE FLOOR TONIGHT..... SILLY GIRL......... I WENT AND VISITED WITH MY MOM I LOVE HER SO MUCH SHE IS MY ROCK.......... AND MY DAD HE IS AWSOME AS WELL....... HE TOOK CARE OF MY BROTHER AND I WHEN HE DIDNT HAVE TO HE IS MY STEPDAD............ BUT HE IS REALLY MY DAD.... THAT IS ANOTHER STORY THAT I AM NOT READY TO TELL YET..... I DONT KNOW WHAT ELSE TO WRITE SO I WILL WRITE MORE LATER.................... AMANDA

BAD DAY

TODAY IS A BAD DAY THE KIDS WONT LISTEN HANNAH IS STANDING HERE CRYING BECUASE I WONT HOLD HER RIGHT NOW BECAUSE SHE IS IN TROUBLE FOR NOT LISTENING TO ME...... DJ WONT LISTEN TO ME SO HE DONT GO FISHING THIS WEEKEND....... THE DOG IS LOCKED IN THE BATHROOM BECAUSE SHE GOT OUT AND MADE ME CHASE HER FOR 30 MINUTES AND ON TOP OF THAT I YELLED AT DISH NETWORK TOO BECAUSE THEY LEFT ME ON HOLD FOR 35 MINUTES ALL OF THIS AT THE SAME TIME............... I CANT TAKE MUCH MORE THE KIDS ARE GOING TO BED REALLLLLLLYYYYYYYYYY EARLY TONIGHT OR I AM GONNA RUN AWAY UNTIL THEY DO LET THEIR DAD DEAL WITH THEM...................... OH AND I HOPE YOU HAVE A NICE DAY.........

ADHD

MY SON D.J. HAS BEEN DIAGNOSSED WITH ADHD AND WAS PLACED ON MEDICATION WHEN THAT MEDICATION KEPT HIM FROM EATING THEY TRIED A NOTHER MEDICATION THAT MADE HIM CRY ALL THE TIME THEN THEY TRIED ANOTHER MEDICATION THAT WOULD MAKE HIM SLEEP ALL THE TIME TO THE POINT WHEN HE WAS AT SCHOOL HE WOULD FALL OUT OF THIS CHAIR ASLEEP AND NOT WAKE UP....... AFTER THAT THEY PUT HIM ON A BLOOD PRESSURE MEDICINE THAT I FINALLY TOOK HIM OFF OF BECAUSE THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH HIS BLOOD PRESSURE.......... PARENTS THINK LONG AND HARD BEFORE U ACCEPT MEDICATION FOR YOUR CHILDREN....... MY SON IS IN A SPECIAL CLASS WHERE HE IS MASTERING HIS OBJECTIVES DAILY........ HE IS ACTUALLY STARTING TO CALM DOWN HIMSELF BECAUSE OF ALOT OF PRAYER AND SUPPORT AND TIME OUTS........ KIDS ARE GONNA BE KIDS THAT IS WHAT THEY ARE SUPPOSED TO BE......... WHEN DJ GETS LOUD WHEN HE IS PLAYING THEN I KNOW HE IS HAPPY AND HAVING FUN JUST WAIT IT OUT THEY CAN CALM DOWN THEMSELVES WITH A LITTE DISCIPLINE.....................

fishing with the kids

MY HUSBAND AND I TOOK THE KIDS FISHING YESTERDAY NEAR THE MOUNTAINS.. D.J. ENJOYED IT BECAUSE THERE WAS THIS WONDERFUL MAN THERE WHEN EVER HE GOT A FISH ON HIS HOOK HE WOULD LET DJ REEL IT IN.... DJ THOUGHT THAT HE COULD FISH AND HE NICELY TOLD THE MAN THANK YOU....... I GOT TO THINKING THAT WHEN WE FEEL LIKE WE CANT DO ANYTHING GOD SHOWS US WE CAN AND EVEN SHOWS US HOW TO DO IT. WE DONT HAVE TO LIVE ON INSTINCT ALONE BUT BY THE GRACE OF GOD

hello all

dealing with death....... D.j's rabbit, thumper, died this morning.... D.j. cried for a little while and then he said mommy why did my rabbit die? i had to think of an appropriate answer for my five year old.. I told him that jesus needed his rabbit for a child that wanted a very nice and loving bunny and jesus saw how wonderful thumper was and decided that was the one that the child should have.... i told dj that the rabbit was alot of responsibilty for him. that god saw that i told him jesus was holding the bunny now dj was alot happier about that explanation then he asked for some fish......................... whatever

kids

sometimes i wonder if it life ever gets better but that is when one of my kids comes up and gives me a hug and says i love you mommy....... isnt it amazing how kids know these things how they know how to make you feel better somtimes they can even look at you and you just melt......... then i wonder what god says to them...... isnt it amazing when people dont have time for their own kids god does he hears them and loves them even more than we dooo.... wow i mean he is a busy man but not to busy to listen to the cries of our children........... just a thought

just about me

hi my name is amanda i live in south carolina i have 2 beautiful children D.J. 5 AND HANNAH 2 THEY ARE THE ANGELS IN MY LIFE. I AM MARRIED TO A WONDERFUL MAN HIS NAME IS DOUG I LOVE HIM VERY MUCH EVEN THOUGH HE DRIVES ME CRAZY MOST OF THE TIME.I HAVE 2 HANDSOME NEPHEWS JORDAN IS 11 AND JOSHUA IS 2 I HAVE TOW BEAUTIFUL NEICES JASMINE 10 AND SYERRIA 6. I AM A FULL TIME MOM AND I LOVE EVERY MOMENT OF IT . I HAVE TWO BROTHERS JEFF AND JOE THEY PICKED ON ME ALOT SO I WOULD CRY BUT I AM OK FROM THAT............. I HAVE A SISTER IN LAW GAYLA THAT IS ALWAYS THERE WITH WORDS OF ENCOURAGEMENT AND ALWAYS KNOWS WHAT TO SAY WHEN I AM DOWN AND FEELING BLUE GO JEFF GREAT CHOICE.................. MY BEST FRIEND IS MICHELLLE SHE HAS 3 WONDERFUL KIDS DANIEL6 HARLEY 4 AND ADAM ALMOST 2 MICHELLE IS ALWAYS THERE FOR ME I COULDNT HAVE A BETTER FRIEND..........I ALSO HAVE A FRIEND HER NAME IS BRANDY I AM SO PROUD OF HER SHE IS GRADUATING THIS YEAR. SHE OVER COME ALL THE ODDS AGAINST HER EVERYONE IN HER FAMILY TOLD HER SHE WOULD NEVER GRADUATE BUT SHE IS DOING IT BRANDY IS ONLY 19 AND IS GETTING FARTHER THAN MOST GROWN UP DO ....................... OK I HAVE TO GO BUT I PROMISE I WILL BE BACK AND REMEBER GOD LOVES EVERYONE OF YOU EVEN THOUGH IT FEELS LIKE HE ISNT THERE HE IS WITH HIS HAND HELD OUT WAITING FOR YOU TO GRAB IT AND HOLD ON